 For this one, you must recruit a partner in crime at the asylum. PULP 1, 2, 3 J (any gender, mid teens through late life) You should work with me here at the asylum. True, when I'm done, I have to spend the night. True, the boss won't let me see daylight. But the work is good And I know we could Make this place much more fun. Here me out if you would. Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes. If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"
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 For this one, you must convince an enemy robot to take you to safety. PULP 1, 2, 3 i (any gender, mid teens though late life) Your battery is almost dead. Use the remaining juice to save me. Don't let the other robots enslave me. You can get me as far As a nearly dry car. Once I'm safe I'll throw away the crowbar. Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes. If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"  For this one, you must convince a talented friend to help you with Voodoo PULP 1, 2, 3 H (any gender, mid teens through late life) He deserves it and you know it. Three long years of working here Under his thumb and living in fear. Voodoo isn't as bad As a boss who drives us mad. Just stick this doll and we will all be less guilty than glad. Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes. If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"  For this one, you must win the chance to survive as a zombie. PULP 1, 2, 3 (any gender, mid teens through late life) I'll have about twelve hours before the bite spreads. When I die, please make an exception. Make me a zombie worth the exemption. Rather than blow off my head Remove my arms and teeth instead. That way, I'll have peaceful means to make sure I'm fed. Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes. If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"  For this one, you must save a group of hot-climate mortals. PULP 1, 2, 3 E (any gender, mid teens through late life) I know it is my job to bring snow from the heavens. But, oh ruler of the Gods, What do you think the odds Of the humans to truly cope When they face a snowy slope Here where seventy five to well into the hundreds is their scope? Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes. If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"  For this one, you must get an enemy on your side before you two are buried alive. PULP 1, 2, 3 (any gender, mid teens through late life) The tunnel entrance has caved in. If you look over your shoulder, you'll see. It's not a trick. Look, you can trust me. Please lower the gun. There's no place I can run. Let's pretend to be friends until we again see the sun. Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes. If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"  For this one, you must test a maniac who claims to be possessed. PULP 1, 2, 3 C (any gender, mid-teens through late life) Cats have a way of knowing these things. If you want proof that the Devil is here Bring the cat. It will run off in fear. But I suspect not. This story you've got Is just your excuse for the damage you've wrought. Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes. If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"  For this one you must win new followers after your leader has died. PULP 1,2,3 B (any gender, mid teens through late life) Simone Cooper was to lead us today. I know there was no one equal in battle But we must move on and stop all this prattle. I have my flaws, I know But follow and I'll show Just how much further Simone's vision goes. Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes. If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"  For this one, you must rally for a surprise attack. PULP CINQUAIN X (any gender, mid teens through late life) Listen. This is our chance. They won't see us coming. Once they do, some of us will die. Not all. Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes. If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"  For this one, you must save the soul of a would-be superhero. PULP CINQUAIN VIII (any gender, mid teens through late life) The cape. It will rule you. I'm already seeing it. You want the cape to help you win? Burn it. Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes. If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage" |
AuthorArtistic Director Matt Haynes presents a new short monologue every day, 2016. The majority of these are gender-flexible and usable for teenagers on up. Feel free to grab any of these for your audition... or just to perform for fun. If you need to trim the beginnings or endings for time, go ahead, but please do not alter the text itself. |
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