For this one, you must convince your young child and yourself that your new home is safe.
JUMPY (any gender, mid twenties through late life)
Oh, kiddo. Oh... I'm sorry. Mommy and I were just talking, that's all. We got loud, She got a little angry. But we were just talking. We thought you were asleep. Why weren't you asleep, you little squirrelly-bird? It's late, late, late. It's time to go to sl--
Okay, you probably heard me crying, right? That was nothing, NOTHING do to with mommy. I just get scared sometimes. Just like you. We're in a new home.That can be scary, can't it? Well, grownups can get scared too. But you are fine. This PLACE is fine. I just have an imagination. Just like you.
You know how you thought you saw something moving under the stove? I got one better for you... you wanna hear? It's pretty funny. I thought I saw something moving under... the TOILET SEAT! Hah-h-
Shhhhhh! okay, okay, okay... don't laugh too loud. Mommy got mad and said that I need to cut it out. Getting so jumpy! Right? Mommy even went in and checked under the seat. You know what she found? Don't laugh too hard. Bubblegum!
The family that lived here before, one of THEIR kids must have done it. Before... before...
But anyway, it's a new home. I'm a little jumpy. Mommy's a little jumpy and YOU are a little jumpy. Still too jumpy to go to sleep, right? Hey, how about you and I jump, jump, jump and get the squirrellies out? Come on, here we go!
Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes. If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"