For this one, you must give forgiveness to and receive forgiveness from your victim.
FEELING (any gender, mid-teens through late life)
I didn't think it would feel like this. I thought that I'd really enjoy this. I WAS enjoying it... getting into your apartment with my bullshit excuse for us to meet. Putting the poison in your Pepsi, watching you start to gag and go into paralysis, oh my God, what a great feeling. What a great feel--
Except now that you're about to die... the final bit I was going to do? I can't do it. I was going to really tell you off: everything you did to me that hurt me. Every way that you're such a bad person. I was going to give you the telling off of all tell-offs and in your last second of life, you'd be sure you were going straight to hell.
But... I can't. I'm not feeling angry at you. I feel... I just feel... sad. And I think I still love you... and maybe I made a big mistake and it's too late. But I need you to know: you deserve love. I need you to show me you understand; I still love you. Before you die. Please. Just give me some sign you understand. Some sign that my love is received?
Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes.
If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"