GERIATRIC (any gender, late teens to late forties)
Way-way-wait. What does that mean?
I'm glad you like the salmon but what do you mean "It's got a silky sweetness like geriatric flesh?"
Cause you know what that's implying, right? I know you're not from around here, maybe in the forth dimension it means something different-- but "geriatric"-- that's a term we use for HUMANS.
ANIMAL flesh is "aged"
It's dry frozen
Hell, it can even be stale or rotten but it's NOT "geriatric." Did you know that?
Cause if you knew what you were saying-- you're saying you like the taste of old people?
Cause, that's not okay. We don't do that here. Do the people in the forth dimension eat each other when you get old-- no, I didn't think so. But then... would you WANT to eat humans? HAVE you guys eaten- Oh God.
I'm sorry Zelnay, I think I have to maybe ruin our date and contact the police. No don't get up. They don't serve salmon in prison and I'm going to make sure you don't get a cell mate who's over 60 so I suggest you finish what's on your plate.
Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes.
If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"