PROPOSAL 3 (any gender, early twenties to late life)
Shiloh, you made the last three years the happiest ones of my life. I could only imagine the future getting better and better with you. I know I don't commit to things easily but I was ready to marry you as well as Shiloh B and Shiloh C. I didn't want that, but you told me you NEEDED your clones with you and I loved you so much...
Proposing to Shiloh B was difficult, it was humiliating. And I got so nervous about proposing to Shiloh C, I got a migraine. I'm sure you thought I'd be relieved to find out it was you the whole time. "Chuckle-chuckle, my other selves are off camping, I have no in intention of including them in our marriage, I just wanted to see how unconditional your love was, chuckle-chuckle."
And now I'll tell you: I've discovered that my love is not unconditional. I don't like it when people play mind games. I don't think it's necessary and I don't think it's cute.
Shiloh B and Shiloh C may be a pain in the ass but they are honest and they love me. They might be ready for marriage. And when they come back, I'll introduce them to my two clones. We'll just find out if something good can come from the last three years.
Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes.
If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"