For this one: You must convince your mother to stop making you go on Vampire Recruitment missions.
RECRUITMENT (any gender, mid-teens to late thirties)
Mother, please don't make me go out tonight. I've been trying to recruit vampires for how long now? A full year? And I haven't gotten a single human to join, to become undead, to become another member of the Great Vampire Clan... which is only made up of you and me.
Do you know what it's like for me out there? I'm not outgoing like you are. Humans just don't like me. It's not that I have trouble blending in, I always stay in low lit areas so people won't see my skin, I always keep my fangs tucked away... but I don't know how to talk to people, mother. And God help me when I have to get a conversation going over dance music.
"HEY SO YOU LIKE TO GO TO CLUBS AND DANCE? THAT'S COOL! I SORT OF LIKE TO GO TO CLUBS AND DANCE TOO! IF YOU WANT TO GO TO ANOTHER CLUB WITH ME AND DANCE SOME MORE, THERE'S A PLACE JUST PAST THE ALLEY-- HUH? OH SORRY, I SAID THERE'S A PLACE JUST PAST-- HUH? SORRY CAN YOU REPEAT THAT? I SAID CAN YOU-"
And off they go. Finding someone else to hit on. No going into the alley with me. No midnight snack for me. And God knows, I won't be seducing anyone into having a full blood drain and joining up.
Mom, what if I just became like an administrative assistant? You still have your looks, you go out, you recruit, I'll keep track of the finances and blood rations and all that. I've tried mother.
If I'm your last hope, then I, I... I just don't know how much hope is left.
Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes.
If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"
RECRUITMENT (any gender, mid-teens to late thirties)
Mother, please don't make me go out tonight. I've been trying to recruit vampires for how long now? A full year? And I haven't gotten a single human to join, to become undead, to become another member of the Great Vampire Clan... which is only made up of you and me.
Do you know what it's like for me out there? I'm not outgoing like you are. Humans just don't like me. It's not that I have trouble blending in, I always stay in low lit areas so people won't see my skin, I always keep my fangs tucked away... but I don't know how to talk to people, mother. And God help me when I have to get a conversation going over dance music.
"HEY SO YOU LIKE TO GO TO CLUBS AND DANCE? THAT'S COOL! I SORT OF LIKE TO GO TO CLUBS AND DANCE TOO! IF YOU WANT TO GO TO ANOTHER CLUB WITH ME AND DANCE SOME MORE, THERE'S A PLACE JUST PAST THE ALLEY-- HUH? OH SORRY, I SAID THERE'S A PLACE JUST PAST-- HUH? SORRY CAN YOU REPEAT THAT? I SAID CAN YOU-"
And off they go. Finding someone else to hit on. No going into the alley with me. No midnight snack for me. And God knows, I won't be seducing anyone into having a full blood drain and joining up.
Mom, what if I just became like an administrative assistant? You still have your looks, you go out, you recruit, I'll keep track of the finances and blood rations and all that. I've tried mother.
If I'm your last hope, then I, I... I just don't know how much hope is left.
Copyright 2016 by Matt Haynes.
If you would like to use this piece, please credit: "Courtesy of Matt Haynes and The Pulp Stage"
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